Wednesday, February 15, 2012


This holiday is not one that we make much of a fuss over. But I can say that I love Bill more and more every year and we have grown closer together over the years and for this I am so thankful!  Many of my friends do not have this same kind of relationship and that just makes me sad.  I cannot even imagine my life without him!!.....But the following is how we showed our love for one another on Valentines Day:

Me through text:

Hey sweetie just wanted to tell that I am so HaPpY that I said YES to you 25 years ago today. I love you so much!

Bill response through text:

I don't know who you think your talking to but I have only been married for 2 years to a young hot chick!  and I am not that old!!!


Oops sorry wrong number!!!

I am so glad that he has a sense of humor....believe it or not that totally made my day!  I wouldn't want him any other way.....I love you Bill Hart!  Thanks for being my Valentine for the last 25 years!

Saturday, February 11, 2012


Dear Jailee,                                                         February 11, 2012

This month marks what would have been a milestone birthday for you!  One that is hard to believe is here already.  How has 21 years gone by? I can still hear your little giggle and wonder what it would sound like now, you had beautiful almond shaped eyes that were blue...would they still be the same?  I wonder if I would still be the shortest one in the family? How tall would you be? I sure wish that you could have stayed so I could have seen what you would have liked to do, how you would have thrown a tantrum, would you have been shy or out going, funny or somber? Had many friends or just a few? I would have loved to see you interact with your friends been there to laugh with you and cry with you! To be your mom was the best thing I could dream of! I was so so excited to think I actually had a girl! I feel so honored that you chose me as your mom if it was only for a few months!  There is not a day that goes by that my heart and mind drifts to visions of you, your smile, how you liked to cuddle and play for hours how you rolled to where ever it was you wanted to get to, how you were lightening fast, how your little head looked everywhere to take everything in. You had the tiniest hands.  I really think that your brothers would have loved to have an older sister, they have asked me many times do you think Jailee would have liked to ski, bike, skateboard?  Or do you think she would have just liked girlie stuff? I always tell them I am sure she would have liked to do all those things as long as she got to do them with her brothers.  In my heart I hope deeply that we would have gotten along, that as you grew into a young women that you would have made good choices, been a girl that received and gave respect, a girl that stood up for the weak, made a difference in our world!  I don't mean that you had to be on a pedestal  all the time, Just that overall you would be good girl!  This world we all come to is full of hard choices, it's a challenge for us all. You had such a sweet innocent short life that at times I envy you....You have made it to the best possible place, while the rest of us have to have struggles, fears, hardships.  There are times I am so grateful you did not have to grow up in these hard times, as I have had to watch your brothers make choices that I wish they would not have, seen them hurt by words and actions of others. But heart aches to hold you, to see you to laugh and cry with you!  Just to have you in our home....but for now I will dream of what life would have been like with you in it and I will smile....just because you were here! I find comfort in knowing that Heaven holds my treasure! I will love you forever my baby girl!   Happy 21st Birthday!